11/06/2007

Inside the mind of the Express reader

I know it's not on to mock the afflicted, but looking at Robertz's profile (one of the commenters on the ethnic crisis story) on the Express site gives a fantastic idea of what goes on in the mind of an Express reader. Just looking at the list of his posts shows what probably goes through his head over and over again on a loop:

Baby Boom - Immigrants.
Immigration - Stinks.
Postal Strike.
Paedos.
Maddy Snatched.
Immigrant Baby Boom.
Paris Hilton Ill My Foot.
**Comment removed**
NURSES PAY ROW
Nulabour Wrecked Health Service.
Maddy, Parents.
FAT JOHN.
Crap Olympic Logo.
fat useless John.
Jumping on Popemobile.
Drink Problem.
WHAT ABOUT JOBS FOR THE ENGLISH?
Evil Vile Fraudster
Maddy Appeal on TV.
Comrade Jack Broone, DONATION ROW.

I imagine him muttering these titles over and over, under his breath except the shouty bits:

Man sitting with his eyes half lidded, mumbling mostly unintelligable murmurs under his breath. Ocassionally something's decipherable.
RobertZ (for it is he): Mmmmblmmrurgah...mmmblm....Crap Olympic Logo...mmm...bbbrrrAH! Fat useless John...Jumping on the Popemobile...mmmpopegrrmmph...Drink problem...mmm...drink problem? WHAT ABOUT JOBS FOR THE ENGLISH?
Almighty crash
Driver: GET OFF MY BUS!

You know what's really worrying? He had a comment removed. What could possibly have been so offensive that the mods at the Express Have Your Say section thought was extreme enough to be deleted? The paper leaves up comments calling for the compuslory sterilisation of ethnic minorities!* Jesus!

Have a look through the comments in any Express story about immigration for a tour around some of the enlightened, progressive, forward-thinking minds in the country. That bit was ironic.

*After the second child, of course, which is much more reasonable. Wouldn't want you thinking that commenter was a vile racist who may well be worthy of being called Nazi. The posts on her profile (spaniel_lover) include one with the title, 'Hodge is spot on' though, so I might have to revise that assessment. Thanks. I'm here all week.

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